today is the day

Today is the day I wore sneakers for the first time since my surgery. I only wore them for about an hour. I went to the gym and got up to a 3.4 on the treadmill with them on for 10 minutes. I did the bike for 15, then came home to ice because it was starting to get sore, and i was starting to get sad again. Look how wide the laces are apart on the left foot because its still so swollen!


Today is the day that was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. A little less than a year ago we decided that we would postpone our wedding from today. Never did I think that the date would come, and our relationship is horribly on the rocks. I thought we would at least be planning for a new happiest day of our lives. Instead I've had the most miserable 2 weeks imaginable.

Today is the day I will do better with my clean eating.  I had a Jafra party last night that 15 of my friends rsvpd yes to. only 3 showed. I had bought all this food and I was so mad. I drank a lot of wine, and ate what i wanted (healthyish, but granted too much). Then I let my roomate convince me to go out for drinks after & I had 3 more cocktail. I have a headache & feel sluggish today. Its affecting my hormones & emotions and Im crying even more today. I am on track with a healthy breakfast today, and will continue the rest of the day. Just going to a friend's dance recital tonight, so no drinking should be involved there.

Today is the day i NEED to start feeling better. This whole issue with Kevin is throwing me on an emotional roller coaster I cannot handle. Not the fun kind, the kind where you want to throw up everywhere.

wish me luck.